Park Lane & Mayfair

After a pretty energetic session at The Goring Hotel the other day – whereby my hair was sticking out in all directions, my mascara was smudged round my eyes like a panda and I was covered in a sheen of perspiration (not to mention the state of my comatose partner) I was ravenous. Not just mildly hungry; not peckish; I could have murdered someone for a cheeseburger, fries and milkshake. I took my grumbling stomach into the bathroom to freshen up and considered my ruddy complexion in the mirror.

Considering the flush all over me, dilated pupils, racing heart and aching thigh muscles, I wondered why I bothered going to the gym or taking spin classes. A daily session akin to the one I just had, would burn roughly 1400 calories in a week (the same as enjoying an Indian and bottle of red wine at a good London restaurant!). I looked at myself from all angles and decided I quite liked what I saw. But while I was preening in the mirror, there were gentle snores coming from the bedroom so he must have enjoyed it too!

So just how many calories DO you burn during a 45-60 minute session? Well that would depend upon agility, experience and enthusiasm. There is also the bendability factor – as a Park Lane and Mayfair escort I can get my feet behind my ears or balance on my hands with my legs in the air – not everyone can get past the standard missionary position. There is also “willingness to co-operate”. Extra calories may be burned whilst one partner begs on bended knees and the other walks away quickly!

Size is definitely an important factor – a man with average or small endowment would work twice as hard at satisfying his partner than a well-endowed man, who may not have to move at all. Which leads me nicely onto a woman’s enthusiasm: laying on your back, planning tomorrow’s dinner would burn 1/2 a calorie as opposed to writhing, screaming and scratching up his back which would burn 90-100. Sexercise is definitely a two-way thing.

Humour aside, sex is good for you. It improves your immune system, helps you tone, burns calories, releases endorphins and cures insomnia. It also seals bonds of attachment between partners and creates new ones. I get told I’m fantastic, beautiful and “the woman of my dreams” at least three times a week… It doesn’t take much to get in the mood when you know which buttons to press or which look to cast with your eyes. In fact, I think I may become an ambassador for a healthy sex life, using vanity as my bargaining too!

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