Park Lane & Mayfair

I’m the sort of person who gets very excited about new ideas and impulsively wants to do it all now. Living in London, working for a top escort agency and experiencing the fantastic things I do daily doesn’t help my must-solitude.

For example, I have quite a pretty rhythm (I think). When Joe, a finance director t, took me back to his marvellous Batchelor pad in Kensington and showed me the pole that was gracing the middle of one of his even seven sitting rooms, I had to show off my gyrating skills along with my new Agent Provocateur undies to ‘Bump and Grind’. When he suggested I take classes to show off what I got, I immediately enquired to a Central London dance crew who had a pole dance school. Well, I went there and stayed approximately 30 minutes before I realised (I think they took about 30 seconds to see it) that no matter how great my body is, I’m a strong, lithe athlete, but I’m not. Yeah, I can kick a few moves on the pole and wrap legs around it raunchily while licking my lips and flicking my hair, but I cannot climb up and hang upside down, nor can I hold on by my ankle – so bang went that genius plan.

My next grand venture was to learn a language fluently. I had accompanied Marco to Milan many times and always picked up on specific phrases that he and I thought sounded sexy when I said them. So, I thought instead of going to college for evening classes and taking the time out of my busy schedule, I would purchase one of those lealearn-on-the-CDs. That idea lasted about a week, and now I think the CD is gathering dust on one of my bookshelves.

If only there were a genius idea of me sharing my shopping skills with another…oh yes, that’s just a girlie afternoon.

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